However, I am currently content to just sit here and type. Okay, fire is loud. This is the LONGEST TEXT EVER! Big Brother may be listening right now so I beter go. Like organ grinders, and the evil conspiracies. Seeya. ", and translated it to German. It took him to my quiz page. It'd be cool. There is a world where you are a slave to your TOASTER OVEN. Oooooo! Just goes to show what boredom can do to you. Yep. If I were to suddenly convert this entrie site into a *shudders* Backstreet Boys fan site or something, you wouldn't be any more suprised than I would be if my brother woke up one day and suddenly realized that he's shallow. With our patented "spray". While you wait for yesterday's tomorrow, lunge back and remember that day. Some of the pages of this site contain a link encouging the two and a half people to e-mail the Patron Saint of Paper Clips. You could be the figment of someone else's dream. I am now barophobic (afraid of gravity). It is the extraordinary sensory quality of his prose that enabled Faulkner to get away with writing the longest sentence in literature, at least according to the 1983 Guinness Book of World Records, a passage from Absalom, Absalom! *sigh* I can't think of anything to write. Anyway, I'm gonna go. Uhdon't think soNumber Four: I could have learned to drive. The food trucks could even play music that made you hungry for their food. You must be caught in a time warp. That teaches our youth that it's okay to agree to help someone, and then ruin their experiment. Get the free Lil' Ball for your traveling needs! I thought you were gonna stay here and keep me company?! I've been a paranoid, conspiracy seeking mood lately and the newest threat to my sanity is: smoke detectors! Not even my friends*sniffle* The just ignore this poor, pathetic little page. Moving on, I finaly managed to coax my sister (I'm tired of writing Mrs. X) to tentativly guess that America fought in the Civil War. I love owls. I'm just bored. William Faulkner in 1954 (Photo: Wikimedia Commons Public Domain)This post may contain affiliate links. my dear theres nothing to fear thats only a box thats made of blocks next to the wagon that looks like a dragon why are you shaking its your fear that is making you shiver and act all a quiver. But somewhere, it exists. I gots stuff to do! Once upon a terribly dreadful time, there was a small cat-licking bird that lived on a lane by my house whose name was Charles just like every other soul, male or female, that lived on my smelly, stinky, orange, old, rotten, messy, busted cul-de-sac between . Which means that there are an infinite number of worlds with humanoid life. I thought it was. And insanity. 'Ah the power of cheese!' Subscribe!function(m,a,i,l,s,t,e,r){m[s]=m[s]||(function(){t=a.createElement(i);r=a.getElementsByTagName(i)[0];t.async=1;t.src=l;r.parentNode.insertBefore(t,r);return !0}())}(window,document,'script','https://www.openculture.com/wp-content/plugins/mailster/assets/js/button.min.js','MailsterSubscribe'); 2006-2023 Open Culture, LLC. When she came back, 'lo and behold, she had a tan. Here, topic, topic, topic! I can just see it nowIt could be called Know-Your-Food. Unless you have a digital camera, which are a symbol of freedom from the old ways and willing enslavement to the new ways. The Patron Saint of Paper Clips in no way wishes harm on your computer. One person, started typing it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue typing it forever just because this is the list that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends, some person started typing it notetc, etc. And most people don't even come here. I worked for four hours at the "Library of Terror" sponsered by TAB. And then go door to door distributing it. After all, look how long this text is. What must I do to rise above obscurity? All rights reserved. I can appreciate a spiffy black outfit as much as the next person, but everytime I consider actually buying clothes for aesthetic value, I think about how I could better spend my money. Okay, maybe it was the ranch dressing instead of the special, fresh buffalo wings. This page won't get a single hit, unless I bribe peoplenow that has possibilities. And you probably suspect that it is something pathetic. Now no one can ever say that I don't take care of my viewers. At least her's makes sensesort of. I've just gotten an idea for some more, original, fortunesI gotta go! These so-called "pointless" signs are doing just what they were meant to do: entertain you! HILARIOUS! How did you ever guess? Why can't I have more readers?! And on to:#4You make your friends look normal in comparison. In the mean time, I'll just sit here and type with my eyes closed. Look how long this has gotten. I accidently cut it with scizzors. That's why it's here, and not some critically acclaimed site. I'm backit's been awhile since I've written here. A good one. When I think of how much money people WASTE on appearences, it makes me feel like projectile vomiting. AND THAT IS WHY TOASTER PASTRIES WILL BURST INTO FLAMES IF YOU DON'T KEEP AN EYE ON THEM! AND I DONT BLAME YOU!! Perhaps Kodak is actually a front organization for a shadowy governmental system that controls the entire world and didn't want mankind to obtain the freedom of the stars and so tried to sabotauge the space program even though it didn't work as well as they planned. Hey, I'm once again: back. I don't think I have any conspiracy theoriesexcept pop-ups/pop-unders. Okay. I'm tired. Any derogatory statement is simply an opinion of an individual, not of the flaming order of the flaming chickens. Think about it. This is going to be a WORLD RECORD! It's not fair! Isn't that like a slang term for an insult? Or maybe I just wanna go to bed. When you look at them they are identical to the evil little Cheez-Its. I wrote about furby, and how it was fun to watch it die. I'm gonna quit for now. Maybe I should just give up. My mother tried to order a mushroom-swiss burgeronly to discover that the place had no swiss-cheese. It would make no sense. We made a guild, and I wrote out the transcripts of the first ever Asparagus War in narrative form (mock epic, very cheesey) Since it's very, very long, I'll post it here to meet my imaginary word quota for the day! And now, back to our featured presentation. She was extremly upset. You figure that one of those 100 people would actually have a coherent phrase. THen we go to library. Anyway, yeah, I'm a furry, but since I'm a young furry, I can't really do as much as I would like to do in the fandom. I was alerted to this growing problem in our world community by (Kat, the ruler of all that is almondy)and it greatly concerns me. You don't know either? I don't want year-round classes. What I want to know is this: are there no intelectual property rights in the world of food products? Is it possible to make less sense? THe cake was good. I better go. I'm back. Now, some of you are probably thinking "Gee, Really? In other wordsthey hurt. We were supposed to write about a cherished child-hood toy, and attempt to turn our fond memories into a commercial. So if you're not most people, you've made it down this far without skipping, skimming or getting the spark notes version. It'd be like someone thinking that scabs are atractive, 'case they protect you from disease. thats iti so tiredbye-bye. She didn't know. while others are thinking "Who's John F. The distance between the two extremes of how much I could have won is 1000np, making me feel like I've won much more than if I'd played a normal game. But, maybe that's just the difference between you and me. That makes me feel alll warm and fuzzy inside. I DO NOT LIKE CHANGE! She's evil. Because I have nothing else to do right now. HenceforthCode: 666 of the Flaming Chickens Handbook states that under no circumstance will the Patron Saint of Paper Clips (guess who) be forced to wear anything other than a t-shirt and preferably black jeans. As you may or may not know, small children swarm the ice cream trucks. Who am I kidding? Everything is fine. Noone can do everything, so how can you expect a SIGN, with the I.Q. SEEYA! If you have some extra time, you can read it at marienbadmylove.com. Hello, everyone! WAIT JUST A POLYP PICKING MINUTE!! Then I realized that the buldozer already HAD been invented. I HAVE POWERS PINTO BEANS CAN ONLY DREAM OF! But you'd never prove it was infinite. about my site, and called me weird. of toilet paper, to do everything. And I wonder where my little sister gets her annoyingness. As long as the bear blends in, you know? But true. Such proofs often use computational proof methods and may be considered non-surveyable . Oh, well. Jonathan Coe's new novel - The Rotters' Club - contains a sentence of 13,955 words. But, whatever. No, we got the greatest family outing of all. There was something else I had to tell you loyal *cricket chirps, someone coughs* fans. Those few who actually could think and avoided the sun were considered to be outcasts. I must defeat the sister site of the Longest Text Ever! Here is a long equation without line number. We had to tell him that he would probley have to wait untill he was 21. The stupid game is still going on and I refuse to quit because I want my points. Sorry if I complained a lot. It cannot behmmmmmaybe I should just use IMAGINARY duct tapeit's easier to come by ,but it's much more expensiveI'm not sure what to do. Although I tell you she can't possibly be normal, since she hangs out with me. Why am I writing? I think mine involved a jaunty song to sing. My favorite stuffJTHMI have my libraries copy of JTHMI shall quote Noodle Boy for you:) (Full copyright/credit to Jonhnen Vasquez for writin' the stuff, I'm just sharing the spleeny goodness with you). And lastly, you'd have to know where the heck this site is. Pretty cool, huh? Sad to admit, but the majority of people would rather read the summary at the back of a book rather than the whole book itself. I think this is so cool that he spent this time on it but who would really read this all, omg i have to read this about a week and im done and i just want to say this have made my day, i have wrote a story which has 12083 words in it. Of course, said adults would have to peel their butt-cheeks off the couchbut they'd have to do that for the delivary man anyway. Waitaren't I already doing that? When I start playing a game, I am on 0. Almost all of the really long sentences are under 1,000 words. The form link is to a 100% fake TAB registration form that you can fill out just for laughs. Once we are on our Lunar Landing Site, we will engage in many exciting activites, primarily related to suffucating and starving. I'd tell it to my little brother as a bed time story. are completly accidental and are not the fault/responsibility of the creators. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. The smoke detector either never went off, or went off and the people just slept through it. Now, in today's society of buying groceries on-line and getting them delivered, why hasn't any other food industry marketed this ingenius idea to bring the product to the consumer. Why can't I? This annoyed my mother further, untill she asked, no, demanded that my father turn the car around so that we could go home. It's been awhile, (at least two weeks) since I've written here. I'm still peeved about the cartoon owl from the Tootsie Roll Pop commercials. JOsh says it was only one piece of cake. What does it sound like? And what did he do to me? Anyway, that's my rant on the new generation that contains my little sister. I don't exactly know where it isoh, well. "Purified" water. If that's not a vast conspiracy, then nothing on this Earth is. NowI'm gonna go and worry about the light on my toaster ovenseeya! Oh, by the way, I noticed that whenever I use spell-check, my stupid computer turns the word probley into to word problem. Although I can't see why you care, because there is a large probability that you do not exist, because I don't think anyone is reading this anymore. I can't think of anything!? Which is exactly what it gets. There's even a money back guarantee. It's an outrage! THE REST OF THE STUFF I TYPE WILL BE COMPLETLY IN CAPS JUST BECAUSE I CAN. Shoot them down like the dogs they are! and Jones: Sho, Kernel; sho now and catching him as he fell and commandeering the first passing wagon to take him to the house and carry him up the front steps and through the paintless formal door beneath its fanlight imported pane by pane from Europe which Judith held open for him to enter with no change, no alteration in that calm frozen face which she had worn for four years now, and on up the stairs and into the bedroom and put him to bed like a baby and then lie down himself on the floor beside the bed though not to sleep since before dawn the man on the bed would stir and groan and Jones would say, flyer I am, Kernel. I've decided to imortalize the stupidity of my dog, Moose. Hello, everyone! It's stupid. Okay. Today was Halloween. So am I. I will show you an example with this completly true stuff that I experienced several years ago. As inshe read the ENTIRE Longest Text Ever. Someday, I'm gonna snap and just delete this entire thing. When you're in space (without a space suit) you don't SUFFUCATE, you don't FREEZE. End of story. API tools faq. So rather than battle her over the concept of getting dressed in the dark, I get up. i like sugar. I clarified, which countries fought in the Civil War. Ormaybe it's the feather off of the cartoon owl from the tootsie-roll pop comercials (onetwothree..*crunch*). 51 min ago Oh, sorry, I thought you knew I was a furry. Oh, who am I kidding. | 14.35 KB, We use cookies for various purposes including analytics. Okay. Or suffer my blindingly moronic nail messages. It's been pretty quiet here lately, which is why I haven't added anything to this text in awhile. I asked her how you dress on the forth of july (she said nice) I asked what the colors red, white and blue were (pretty). The researches even used highly advanced technololgy to map the surface of a pancake and compare it to documented geology of Kansas. OkayI'm backI think that eventually half of this thing will consist of the word back over and over againthat's just weird. I mean, come on! Sothe plan is going to fail. I don't understand it. Not that my mother is annoyingjust set in her ways. It's an honest question as I fear that my non-gender specific sibling is weird. Enjoy! Longest Sentence. It actually lists what random minerals they through in to make it TASTE like salt. Plus, I am horrible at spelling. She likes sniffing potentially dangerous stuff, like electrical sockets. Not only that, Dum-B-Gon: stimulates weight loss, cures "any" illness, does simple houshold chores, never leaves the toilet seat up and is the perfect gentle companion for your kids. We slept. And I asked myself "How could I have better spent my time?" That would explain that annoying green little blinkie light in them. This is a list of unusually long mathematical proofs. That my words somehow travel accross time (if only a few minutes) and are somehow picked up by future you, and that my responses are dictated by future you's reactions. But they really were'nt buffoal wings 'cause buffalo's don't have wingscause they come off when they are babies, JOsh says so and he must be right causse he's been having Profound Thoughts even though he cannot remember them. I'm glad you're not just in my life but that you're my better half. Are you ready? A man has been recorded spending more than three hours to pronounce what is supposedly the longest word in the English language . That just sounds nifty! Read that onetime longest sentence in literature, all 1,288 words of it, below. Gone would be the days when parents told children to play outside, it's a nice day. Just like thos so called "diet supplements" that give you a "free" sample because they know that once you try it, you'll like it so much you'll spend oodles of cash on it. Remember to send your answers to my sanity quiz to the e-mail account, flamingchickens333@hotmail.com Oh, and once I refer to myself in the first person again, the handbook quote is over. I'd probably lose money, but the concept is interesting. This is just a pointless excursive in spelling errors and grammatical imprecision. Number Nine: Now it's just getting redundant, isn't it? Ooooooooooooo! I's making fake soundtracks like the teacher told me! GeeI wish I'd thought of that sooner. I know, I'll start of list of why it's fun/good to be insane/weird! And the plan would have failed and Neo might have died, along with a large portion of the city (the building was set to blow if there was any intruders) SoNeo's choice to attempt to save Trinity triggered the sequence of events that led to her death. They are the samething, with the same look, and almost same name. Chomp" And he bites it. *giggling* It's very, very late at nite. Except for maybe five and six. It deludes all of American's sweet, innocent, candy-loving children into thinking that a cartoon owl is smarter than they are! I'm just as upset about this unfortunate lack of development in the pie division. Unfortuantly, we had already driven 337 miles toward our destination. claims no knowledge as to where that particullary nasty rumor started, but confirms that this is the best site ever. People need to make the time to waste time. You know you want to! You expect far to much of the inanimate world. I gave up in exasperation. Parents would buy their children computers, video games and other television neccesities. In English, and stuff, if you miss one little detail, at most you lose partial credit, but you usually get it all right. **** MY NAVEL ITCHES!! I see. You cannot follow the vast, mind-boggling logic that is ME! I admit it. Especially the part about the biscuits and cheese. THAT IS ALL. Did you really think I'd give you guys my ADDRESS? I gotta go. I know, I took you completly by suprise. !STARE DEEP INTO THE STINKING ABYSS OF MY INDIVIDUALLY WRAPPED SLICES!!! WHAT!? And not so pissed at my weird family. The movie ends with him in a coma. There ARE aliens. MOOOO! Yea, me! You say I'm really just talking to myself? The Patron Saint of Paper Clips (me again!) I've been playing one of the new neopets slot machines (black pawkeet). If you expect nothing and get something, you're happy. So we were already off to a bad start. Eventually, this would become a monthly tradition. Even the air is conspiring to squish me! Men, of course, had no complaints. If I had 500np with me, I'd be at-500. I'm just rambling. Okay. 3,861 . Now, wasn't that entertainment. You'd have to be an absolute loser (or really bored) to come here. It's called Hit-Or-Miss, any topics, plot, etc. Why, the assasinating annoying cartoon characters buisness. This is a test, I repeat only a test. Yes. Neither of us thought to question the other. We could call ourselves TACO! Why, that would be insane, wouldn't it? YOU'RE ALL ZOMBIE THIGH-FAT PEOPLE BROUGHT INTO ANIMATION BY SOME EVIL FORCE OF FORCEFUL EVIL!!! And so, I'll take a trip down memory lane, to the dark depths of the past, to when I decided to make this page. Code: 472 of the Flaming Chickens Handbook states that this site in no way aknowledges the existance of other, better sites (hereon reffered to as the Losers) The Losers are a myth. HA-HA! How do you know I even exist? *sigh* *sniffle* *snort* *insert word that is a sound that begins with an "s" here* I don't have much time, so, I must be brief. But one of my classes is work, and two others are horrible year-round classes. (may the moose be with you) And now I am back. I'll only say that it was the first game you could "talk" to and was the first (and only) N64 virtual pet. I think that they should routinly die a slow, savage, agonizing deathI was just saying a random thing that I would never, ever do.) To compound things, I wasn't alone, and things just escalated. HEEEEY! 11. Unless he has already been destroyed by an even more radical Anti-Cartoon-Owl group. Oh, well. To pour your heart and soul into a passage, and have everyone ignore it. No one I know is that obsessed with earrings, it was just an example. I realize that this longest text ever must be very boring and not worth anyone's time. Okay, quote is done. How can you pass up this revolutionary new product? Any miniute now. Okay, now I'm starting to scare myselfI'm gonna quit for today. I few months ago I saw a movie about that. I'll will most likely still be adding to this on my death bed. I SEE WHAT IS TRANSPIRING HERE!!! Hmmmmgood question. On the way home, we had gotten approximatly 4 hours into the trip when my mother predicatably decided that we had to go back and eat at the 50th aniversary of her favorite ice cream place. What kind of reasoning is that? My mom did it to her because it was free. I'm leaving nowI have some destruction to do. Sonaturally I put her arch-enemy in my pocket and brought it home with me. Hours of completly useless fun! Perhaps you don't have time to waste e-mailing me. I know this is the best site ever, thanks for the compliment! I've heard of poems and stuff written by people who were high, insane or paranoid. you will all suffer as i have suffered when and if you graduate. *normal voice* Today I have a very important to discuss with you in this: PERFECTLY NORMAL PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCMENT. You know, the small, white feather. He would do everything in his power to keep his dream from becoming reality. If I did, would I stop this? Here's what I wrote this weekend: Woooooo! Also, I guess I still am trying to get the world record. I'm so happy! There MUST be some sort of conspiracy involved, 'cause if there is, I can get rid of the EVIL thing! It was down for a whole day or so 'cause of all the traffic I got from my new quizes. So, it is now up to you, the imaginary reader, to decide whether I mean probley or problemit's almost like a game! There may also be evil little links that are designed to confuse you. It seems like blaggerent plagerism. It only takes me a few minutes to get ready, then I can go back to bed. *hides large ax behind back* Come here, topic! Space is notorious for not having air. Sodoesn't that make you want to take Kansas' side (I sincerly appologize if you are from Kansas). They started shaking and barked their little heads off. Okay. He goes for Trinity, makes it just in time to catch her body, and starts her heart back up. And if you expect something and get nothing, you feel cheated. At least it's over. I bet it's spelled monkeys. All I know is that I've been assuming one thing while the person in charge has been assuming a completly different thing. It's amazing, it's incredible, it's unbelievable. Goodbye for nowNow I'm back. Wellprepare to be enlightened. Squirell? *content sigh* There we gothat's much better. Now MY brain meats feel explody. I confirmed that the Union was Northern and Free, and that the Confederacy was Southern and Slave. thank you always. If that happens, then no one will read this. I mean, she traded Asia for a carrot! and eat dinner. My point is that smoke detectors have very little value in home security. I WANT to write. Oh, but I did remember what else I wanted to say to you people. Kennedy?" Sonow I am down to one and a half readers. The events of Neo's dream unfold. )so you can travel to the 5th Dimension like our scientists almost did. I hate Math. I only mention this 'cause I've accidently spelled constipation instead of conspiracy a few times. Then you'll see these cute little "days-of-the-week" earrings at the mall, and you'll just have to get a few sets, just in case you lose some. Mar 25th, 2014. maybe the longest text ever. WaitI really don't even know if anyone bothers to read this. Subliminal messanging also explains the successes of certain fast-food resteraunts, and brand name items. I'm getting bored, so I think I'm done for the day. GRRR!! Everyone, clap for "Meg".I gotta goseeya later! Hmmmmmmonkey. People just don't realize that their almonds and mixed nuts may be having depression and other problems. What I mean is, you wouldn't be very proud if the average person said that they just took a dookey on the toilet, and you wouldn't be very proud if they knew who fought against the Union in the Civil War. It's time to warn you, the viewererreaderabout the evils of various stuff. They expand your mind, making you think about all the things they could do. That's talent. Or, if I was weirder than I am, I could at least kill the monkey with the organ and eat it. Because they put subliminal messages in them, of course! Which means that it doesn't matter if you understand anything I say. RANDOM PERSON: Uh-huh, that's nice. This action has made her very suspicious of where my loyalties lie. TAB members got pizzalots of pizzaand candy. While studying at Johns Hopkins University, Barth found himself writing about his native Eastern Shore Maryland in a pastiche style of middle Faulkner and late Joyce. He may have won some praise from a visiting young William Styron, but the finished opus didnt flyfor one thing, because Faulkner intimately knewhis Snopses and Compsons and Sartorises, as I did not know my made-up denizens of the Maryland marsh. The advice to write only what you know may not be worth much as a universal commandment.
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